None of us asked to be here, on a rock, spinning through space with teeming billions of others. None of us asked for the burden of responsibility to take care of the walking, talking meat mech we call a body. That responsibility compounds if you have any decision-making power, whether at work, at school, or in your own family, spawning in more unwitting players to a game you’re stumbling around in.

“If only life had an instruction manual,” is a phrase I’ve heard repeated over and over and over again. The strange part is that it does. We call these manuals philosophy or religion. We build systems based on these blueprints, turning them into government and economy which, in turn, adds layers upon layers of depth to the Great Game of Life. New mechanics, new updates, new patches, new bugs (some intentional, some not).

But most of these player handbooks were written to benefit a specific group, not the entire playerbase. They’re painted with bias by the players who wrote them as a strategy for them to “win” the game. What does “winning” even mean anyway? It doesn’t help matters that it’s something different to everyone.

While I’m attempting to write my own handbook to the Great Game of Life (not to be confused with the Hasbro board game or the 19th-century rivalry between the Russians and British empires), it’s not without its own bias. I’m imperfect too, after all.

However, my goal here is to give people insight into the source code, not just surface level stuff that we were born into and only know because it’s taken centuries (and, in some cases, millennia) to build them. Most of these instruction manuals were written with the belief that the Game is zero-sum (that there must be losers in order for there to be winners), a premise I reject in favor of a positive-sum approach (that everyone can win without the implication that someone else must lose for that to happen).

We live in a world filled with wonder, beauty, abundance, and technology. As a species, we have been able to solve seemingly-insurmountable problems, turned away from the brink of cataclysm in favor of our better angels, and, in the long-term, continue to improve and find our way in the darkness of the void that surrounds our planet.

But everything feels worse lately. Your job demands more of you while giving you less. You need food but you’re forced to choose between needlessly expensive groceries or even more expensive rent. The systems you were told to trust (government, insurance companies, corporations, and NGOs) are more honest about their indifference to not fulfill their end of the social contract. The costumer (you) is expected to pay for service that the provider (them) is allowed to monopolize and then not provide quality you were promised.

People feel aloof and distant, caught up in their own worlds as everyone is too exhausted, angry, overworked, and underpaid. The sense of community feels more like bickering tribalism, that the only way to respond to the braying masses is to, in turn, yell loudly and dehumanize your neighbors to justify that anger. Even still, there are a few people where this isn’t the case, winning in their own way because they benefit from the system and its brokenness — or, more dangerously to the status quo, thrive in spite of it.

It is my goal to help you with that second part. Every player to this Great Game is given the gift of Free Will. You don’t need to deal with all the bullshit — and you can still exist in a way that doesn’t compromise who you are or the person you want to be (assuming you just want to live a happy life and, at minimum, be a net positive for having existed in the game at all). You can do so peacefully, creatively, and in a way that fulfills you deeply.

That is because of one fundamental truth: human-made problems can be fixed with human-made solutions. And no matter how big the problem is, it’s not impossible, nor do you have to handle it alone.

But before we get into that, let’s focus on what’s in front of us, here and now. It isn’t your job to change the world, after all. But it’s your responsibility to be a good steward of it.

You might already be familiar with the concept of tabletop RPGs but for those who aren’t, let me give you a primer. You are an adventurer, a player-character in a world that stretches out before you. You, like all other characters (both playable and not), have a series of stats and abilities; an inventory of equipment, money, and other sundries; a backstory; a class or profession; skills and weaknesses; and your own motivations.

Some characters wish to become powerful, others wish to become rich, and others still might want to become famous. There are more goals than there are people, sometimes conflicting, sometimes collaborating. Most players in the Great Game regurgitate goals from the script they were raised in without thinking much as to why they want that single-family home on a quarter acre with 2.5 kids, a spouse, and a job that’s loyal to them for most of their adult life. Sure, a nice dream… but it’s not everyone’s dream nor is it as attainable within the script for those who still want it.

Today is the day, dear adventurer, that you can choose to begin to write your own story.

You choose the goal.

You describe your character.

You take stock of your inventory, your skills, those in your party and those you still need.

But, most importantly, you must be willing to be accountable for your journey. Every reward you receive, every risk you take regardless of outcome, every choice you make and don’t. Past, present, and future, including the choice, here and now, to start anew.

For this exercise, I will serve as the Game Master (or GM for short), the person behind the scenes of the simulation, running calculations to imaginary scenarios, nudging you along to keep you engaged in the story and focused on your goals.

By teaching you this way, you’ll begin to see the parallels between the player handbook you’re reading now and the Great Game of Life you were born into. You’ll gain the confidence to rewrite old scripts that served others into new scripts that serve you and your goal. You’ll be able to make better judgment calls and handle unfortunate circumstances with grace and intellect.

But the greatest power you’ll achieve here is reconnecting with the creative agency all humans are born with yet few nurture properly. Instead of mindlessly going about your days, you’ll have a keen awareness not just of where you’re at, but your role in the greater story of the Game and how it affects others — for better or worse.

The awareness might sting, like staring into sunlight after months of dreariness and rain, though that’s temporary. The realization that your life could’ve been more in line with what you wanted might be painful, but the short-term bruise of that realization to then pivot back on track is preferable to the long-term disease you’d otherwise allow to fester, killing your dreams for what you were convinced was the “safer” option by a system that cares only for your compliance, not your happiness.

And if your mind is already flooded with excuses as to why this can’t happen, you must silence them before you can continue. Because giving into them simply means you’re not able to begin your adventure, whether by choosing the devil you know or simply not knowing how to choose otherwise.

As far as we know, we only get one life in this Game. No checkpoints or quicksaves. No do-overs without having to turn the whole party around to go back, spending precious time in the process.

You can begin whenever you’d like as the protagonist in your own adventure — or live out your days as a pawn in someone else’s.

If you’d prefer the first option, stick around. To begin, let’s start with the most basic, yet most important question: who are you?

Since we’re getting started, if you know someone who’s been feeling stuck and unhappy with their life, looking for motivation and the power to change their current situation, please share this post and newsletter.